XCOM Crossovers that'd never work

[The_Funktasm]

Essentially, what would be the worst or most humorously mismatching crossovers for XCom.

First, Fist of the North Star:

Yeah, fighting aliens with a divine martial art is great, but plasma isn't something you can pluck out of the air and throw back at someone. And XCOM isn't exactly the setting to spend a whole episode reminiscing about someone you've lost... It would however possibly benefit from units exploding into bits.


Evangelion:

We've all had that squaddie that goes berserk or breaks at the exact wrong moment. That. Essentially that times 100 or more. Like imagine that squaddie is the BEST POSSIBLE HOPE!


System Shock:

"I think I'll get those aliens once I get more clips for my favorite weapons! And some medikits..." (wow, it's like the real thing!)


Command and Conquer:

"Maybe with enough squaddies, I can beat this alien base! Maybe not... Better build a few more Avengers..."


Day of the Tentacle:

"The flickering fluorescent light makes the sectoids look especially threatening!"


And etc... I think you guys get the model by now.

[yrizoud]

Pokémon:
"Gotta catch'em all, before they take over the world!"

[Solarius Scorch]

Fake Taxi and similar.
You can't see inside cars in X-Com very well and you can't enter small cars. Combined with low battlescape resolution, it wouldn't work.

[Warboy1982]

UFO and TFTD

[Cmndr_Stryker]

How about Borderlands?

" Introducing... XCOM: Cydonian Assualt! The first ever game in the franchise with four player co-op and over 100,000 versions of the same Laser Rifle everyone loves.  Don't forget the endless alien massacre required to level up your character.  Starring: Generic soldier classes,  The Martian next door, and a final mission that doesn't even involve going to Mars."

[Slaughter]

X-COM/Signs.

"Research Finished: The Dihidrogen Monoxide Solution."

"Commander, experiments indicate the aliens die if exposed to water.  It works like acid on them.

Our intel indicates the aliens use no tools or weapons in their invasion, despite their ability to travel across the Universe. They are physically strong and fast, but otherwise can be deterred by a simple sturdy wood door. We have determined the best model of wooden door to combat this threat.

We have manages to procure the most powerful and effective squirt guns, super soakers, water cannons and firecars. Our organization has also built simple but effective water vapor grenades. They are now available for purchase.

We have also built efficient armor made of metal plates interlocked with water baloons. We believe this shall be a most effective mean of protection.

According to our projections, the aliens will be extinguished from wetter regions in a few days. We should be able to eradicate and capture the rest of these invaders in a few weeks and minimum casualties on deserts and other dry areas.

Good hunting and have fun, Commander!

Enviado de meu SM-G3502T usando Tapatalk

[Countdown]

X-COM/Signs.

"Research Finished: The Dihidrogen Monoxide Solution."

"Commander, experiments indicate the aliens die if exposed to water.  It works like acid on them.

... We have manages to procure the most powerful and effective squirt guns, super soakers, water cannons and firecars.

Haha, great reference. I actually liked the movie Signs for entertainment, but yeah the whole logic with aliens not using their tech and then being killed by water was kinda dumb.

[Roxis231]

Conker's Bad Fur Day.

You can only hit the Aliens with what you find on the ground, the terror units are humanised Dasies and the Cyberbrain is a 200 ton pile of Opera singing POOP that you can only defeat by hitting it with rolls of toilet paper.

Weedkiller based flamethowers, and rocket propelled toilet paper missiles anyone?

[alinare]

XCOM and Mazinger Z.

[The_Funktasm]

I was about to say Dragon Ball Z, but then I realized...

One terror mission lasting 60+ turns.
Only being able to have one Commander at a time. Like for life.
That bug with difficulty.
A lot of dead civilians.
Saving the world but not publicly.
"Shoot it with the Heavy Plasma/Blaster Launcher/Spirit Bomb! It's the only way!"
The bad guy just sitting there in the smoke cloud that's clearing around him from the attack that didn't kill him.
The weak link on the team that somehow escapes promotion every time.

And so on...

Then there's a more appropriate one that wouldn't work at all. Rome: Total War or any Civ game.

Why? You'd lose America to the aliens every time, first month even, if it was based on the current political climate. (no, really... look at the matrix, or they live. "I didn't sell out! I bought in!")

[SquirrelofNukes]

Doom and Xcom

let me mow down this pinky demon
op welp doomguy is dead
HELL IS HERE
HARAMBE

[ohartenstein23]

Doom and Xcom

let me mow down this pinky demon
op welp doomguy is dead
HELL IS HERE
HARAMBE

Try playing Piratez, you may be interested in some of the sources of inspiration.

[SquirrelofNukes]

Try playing Piratez, you may be interested in some of the sources of inspiration.

I saw that..... lol

how bout X-COM and Kerbal Space Program and Battlefield 1

guy with a trench club and Mk. IV tanks vs a battalion of sectoids 

[The Reaver of Darkness]

Grand Theft Auto

Steal a battleship and use it to blast other alien craft, alien bases, then fly it to Cydonia and blast the whole city to bits from orbit. The space police take your toy away but at least your planet is safe from the (stellar) neighborhood thugs.

[wolfreal]

Grand Theft Auto

Steal a battleship and use it to blast other alien craft, alien bases, then fly it to Cydonia and blast the whole city to bits from orbit. The space police take your toy away but at least your planet is safe from the (stellar) neighborhood thugs.

Actually, that one sounds funny to play