Author Topic: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste  (Read 1374195 times)

Offline Solarius Scorch

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4320 on: October 27, 2024, 10:25:07 am »
It's not a typo, it's me who cannot into English. Meaning that I'm looking at this sentence without understanding what's wrong with it. Help please?

Offline psavola

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4321 on: October 27, 2024, 11:12:30 am »
I think "yet" would be better than "but", but I'm not sure if "but" would be wrong either. Or if this is what OP meant.

But to be honest, I'm not even sure what the whole sentence is trying to say. Are these supposed to be as good *and* functioning (but still addictive?), and the difference is that you can get these from the markets and don't need to join the exalt gang to feed your addiction? If so, the sentence could be rephrased.

Offline Jimboman

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4322 on: October 27, 2024, 01:08:51 pm »
I think "yet" would be better than "but", but I'm not sure if "but" would be wrong either. Or if this is what OP meant.

But to be honest, I'm not even sure what the whole sentence is trying to say. Are these supposed to be as good *and* functioning (but still addictive?), and the difference is that you can get these from the markets and don't need to join the exalt gang to feed your addiction? If so, the sentence could be rephrased.

Might I suggest shortening the sentence to '...which works just as well but won't force you into joining an alien army in exchange.'  It makes more sense that way to a native English speaker.

Online CrazedHarpooner

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4323 on: October 27, 2024, 01:27:41 pm »
It's not a typo, nor gramatical or even syntactical issue, it's more a lack on sensical meaning, the "but" would indicate some exception to the cracked version vs the original psiclone, so saying that it's "but functioning" you're implying that the original is "non-functioning". Without a clarification of what the intended text is suppose to inform the reader of, it's not easy to propose a solution. Even if we change the "but" with "yet" the same issue remains, it still tries to inform about an exception of what it does (doesn't) that the original doesn't (does).

On a side note, since I read the whole text. The part that starts as "We can now understand..." can be rewritten as "We now understand how Psiclone works well enough..."
- "Can" is simply unnecessary
- "The" is a nightmare to handle when dealing with proper nouns. For example, it's used when referring to names of rivers, seas and oceans, but NOT when used with names of lakes or mounts and then you do use it again with mountain ranges. However, in this case I see it used in a similar manner as drug names, they don't use the article "the". Additionally, sometimes you case use the article with proper nouns that don't normally use it for an emphasis effect.

Offline Solarius Scorch

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4324 on: October 28, 2024, 02:15:53 am »
Thanks for the help, everyone.

To clarify: what I wanted to say with that sentence is that your psiclone:
1) Is as functional as EXALT's,
2) Is currently better than EXALT's products, because we actively dampen the effect on EXALT devices (as mentioned in the previous sentence).

Offline Nerro

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4325 on: October 28, 2024, 01:38:17 pm »
A fix would simply be to swap "but functioning and" with "and functioning but".

Edit: Actually, to stay coherent with the previous sentences, I would change to "[...] we will flood the market with our functioning Psiclones which will be just as good but, you know, [...]".
Since "functioning" refers to the fact that the Exalt psiclones are disabled, it is clearer if the word is used sooner.
« Last Edit: October 28, 2024, 01:45:55 pm by Nerro »

Offline Solarius Scorch

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4326 on: October 28, 2024, 05:13:27 pm »
A fix would simply be to swap "but functioning and" with "and functioning but".

Edit: Actually, to stay coherent with the previous sentences, I would change to "[...] we will flood the market with our functioning Psiclones which will be just as good but, you know, [...]".
Since "functioning" refers to the fact that the Exalt psiclones are disabled, it is clearer if the word is used sooner.

Many thanks.
I get it, but I feel like "with our functioning Psiclones which will be just as good but, you know" may be in contradiction to the EXALT psiclones being non-functional at the moment. So X-Com psiclones aren't "just as good", they are the only good psiclones on Earth.
Am I making sense?

Offline Nerro

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4327 on: October 28, 2024, 05:42:58 pm »
I think the main issue is that there are to many information in the same sentence. It is hard to make clear which part of the sentence is related to which idea.


Since there is no reason for the X-Com psiclone to not be "just as good", I would suggest dropping it to make space for a clearer description of the X-Com psiclones and go for something like:
"we will flood the market with our cracked Psiclones which will be immune to the disruption and, you know, [...]"

Online CrazedHarpooner

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4328 on: October 28, 2024, 05:50:54 pm »
I think I need some background, correct me anywhere that I'm wrong. By what I've read in the different exalt articles that mention it, I take it that the aliens are providing intentionally "defective" psiclones that do work or barely work, and require frequent replacement via different means (they create an addiction and/or they breakdown relatively soon, etc). Once XCOM becomes aware of this and understands how the devices work it can then provide a fully functional Psiclone that neither requires replacement nor produces an addiction. Is this the gist of what you're trying to describe in the article?

Offline rkagerer

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4329 on: November 11, 2024, 01:50:43 pm »
A couple more UFOpaedia text fixes to make them read better in English.  In the Puppetmaster entry, remove the word "the" before "humanity".  It should just say "if they weren't enemies of humanity".


Also in the Cereal Cult topic, change "found its place" to "found its way".  Or even better, you could say "insinuated itself into"


BTW, is there a reason it's called Cereal Cult?
« Last Edit: November 11, 2024, 01:53:39 pm by rkagerer »

Offline psavola

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4330 on: November 11, 2024, 01:54:01 pm »
I guess they love their breakfast and grains. I have wondered about the same thing.

Offline Solarius Scorch

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Re: Bugs, crashes, typos & bad taste
« Reply #4331 on: Today at 09:49:13 pm »
Thanks for the fixes. Included!