#######'s Log, Day 1, Month 5, Year ERRO
Well, when no one was looking I managed to sneak into the lab. Lots of various Pewtahs and other miscellaneous devices. I managed to hack into this Pewtah, well, hack being a loose term, they just left the Pewtahs on when they went to sleep, and I don't think anyone has a password for them, either. Anyways, I've been walking around late at night, as the Hellerium-fueled generators make a very irritating 'whirr' noise under my bunk that I cannot seem to get any reasonable amount of sleep in. That's okay though, the less I sleep the better place of mind I get to when mak-
*** END LOG ***
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See you soon!"#######'s Log, Day 2 Month 5, Year ERRO
Well, that was embarassing. I, uh, should probably talk about more important things, shouldn't I? Well, uh I have been watching the Gals lately...no, it isn't weird or anything I've just been...admiring them, that one short-haired Lass recently ditched her Chintin plates, saying something profound about the edges poking her "nether" regions.
I do like the new look, honestly. Plus I tried messing around with that SMG a few nights ago...it burns? It looks like the projectiles are a small casing filled with jelly-like fuel, but, uh, anyways, she's taken to twirling the thing around in the Evening, which unsettles me and the other Runts an awful lot, sometimes, she even does it on that weird stick of hers that she apparently gives a new name to every Sunday...strange.
This one also seems to of abandoned her Chintin plates, at least for the time being, something about needing to "drive closer" and hit them with her sword. I don't understand the implications of that, but she can definitely run faster without massive plates of shell obstructing her legs. That sword is something to behold though, weighs like an axe and hits with the precision of a Saber, I wouldn't want to be on the other side of that thing, for sure.
When I was down in the mess hall for an Atom Beer or two, and I saw this one sitting at the far edge of the room, watching some kind of grainy, black-and-white holofilms, I didn't see much of it, but the end result is clear. She took a liking to the new stock of Tommy Guns we got, supposedly from a man named Tommy. She kept demanding that we give her some smokes, but kept claiming that the ones we had were 'too small,' small or not, she certainly has a knack for swinging that thing around, sometimes one-handed. I'll keep my distance in the mess hall from now on, I think.
*** END LOG ***
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Have a nice day!"#######'s Log, Day 15 Month 5, Year ERRO
Well, the Gals came back from a mission today, looking like they had seen a ghost. Turns out that wasn't quite true, but also not far from the actual truth...
After seeing what appeared to be one of these things "winking" at one of them, they high-tailed it out of there real quick.
Not all was lost today, however, the Gals successfully "liberated" a crackhouse, there was one survivor, but more importantly the drugs were all rescued.
Apparently one of the gals got a nasty bruise from one of their B-Boys hitting her with a bat...how uncouth, though I am sure she will walk it off by the Day's end.
Thankfully her pain is not in vain, we received a nice little compliment of beer and vodka, tonight we shall drink!
*** END LOG ***
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Remember the famous VooDoo chant: 'don't crash, please don't crash'"
#######'s Log, Day 30 Month 5, Year ERRO
The Gals went out for another mission today, something about putting down some nutty conspiracy theorists, I'm sure that no one will miss them, but it turned out that during the mission we got quite a good haul of any Pirate's most important basic ingredient...apples!
I've been considering what kind of beverages we could make with such delicate orchards, I only can hope that the Gals don't take all the apples before we can do anything productive with them.
Additionally, it turns out that this tinfoil inbreds actually carried some quirky firearms, distinguished by the unique 'PING!' they seem to make when empty on ammunition, though they certainly hit like a Mule on a hydrosled, so best keep your head away from the business end of that thing.
Note: These Ruffians have very nice bandanas, I wonder if no one would notice if I took a couple off their corpses? Ah well, I'll see as much tomorrow.
*** END LOG ***
str_closing_farewell_403 has encountered a Runtime error, please contact your Administrator or Technical support.#######'s Log, Day 1 Month 6, Year ERRO
To answer the aforementioned question, yes, they did notice. I should of left after the 11th one, but I guess that's a lesson I will have to use later.
*** END LOG ***
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Remember that the grass is always greener on the other side!"
#######'s Log, Day 11 Month 6, Year ERRO
It has been pretty quiet as of late, but the Brainers came through with a new and innovative weapon one has called the "Long Range, Intermediate, Caliber .60, Assault Marksman Rifle, Self-Loading" but in truth, I just think it looks like a
slightly better Musket, and even then...I think I'll just call it a Flintlock rifle, for now at least.
*** END LOG ***
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An Apple a Day Keeps the Doctor Away!"
#######'s Log, Day 17 Month 6, Year ERRO
Today we sent out the Gals again to free another Whore House, but for the first time some of our non-mutant Brethren accompanied them. One of the gals keep calling these Peasants her "butterflies" and seems to take to caring for them...kind of a nutter she is, but these Peasants certainly have dedication and a willingness to fight, so they may be useful after all.
Additionally, another mission we found some devices of interest, we are plenty accustomed to Laser weapons, especially since they've been used industrially around these parts for years, but this one we found seems to be a whole 'nother caliber of Laser Weapon entirely, vastly outperforming anything we presently have in both accuracy, firepower, and versatility.
It is a shame the ammunition is harder to come by than pretty much anything else we have, and no one can or will sell us any ammunition for it. So I guess as of now it will have to sit around collecting dust, though I hope that this will promptly change.
*** END LOG ***
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Remember, loose lips might sink ships."
#######'s Log, Day 21 Month 6, Year ERRO
Well, that crazy "butterfly" Gal I was mentioning earlier finally gave themselves a fancy, and somewhat pretentious, name and started talking about how they were "destined" to lead a great Army of butterflies like "Yaleckzender the Great," I'm not sure how much I believe the legend of this supposed Yaleckzender, much less that she can do anything remotely comparable to his legend, but I guess time will ultimately tell.
Matching the insanity of the Lord of Flies, we finally got a secure connection with the notorious Krazy Hanna, though the term 'secure' may not be fitting, in the least bit because she sent her security detail of botch-job machines and machinations to deal with us in a less-than-diplomatic fashion. However, thankfully one of the Gals was able to calm the frustrated Hanna and convey that we wanted to buy some of her devices. While it calmed her down, I'm not sure if a prolonged business relationship with this Hanna is a wise idea for our continued health and integrated body matter, but there is no denying the scale and utility of the ordnance she offered for sale.
*** END LOG ***
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♪ Praise be the Glorious Leader and his infinite wisdom ♫"
#######'s Log, Day 23 Month 6, Year ERRO
We came across a small Academy Vessel that had foolishly decided to land, the Brainers suspect they were trying to refuel and rearm but considering the craft touched down in the middle of some desolate and Gods-forsaken farm, I find that hard to believe.
The first two Gals to leave our little craft were carrying brand-new Light Machine Guns, the paint still fresh from one of Krazy Hanna's large autonomous production contraptions. The darted to a small fence and used it to lay up their weapons, which provided awesome firepower. They were supposed to suppress the enemies directly to our front but they killed them instead, so I guess that works too. Immediately after them followed Lord of Flies and Supreme Lord of All Good And Evil Madame Skeleton (yes, I am being facetious) who chugged away two rounds into Academy Snipers holed up in one of the farm houses. Sweet Phoenix decided to follow their lead and with a distinctive 'thump' fired an Acid-laced cannonball, and no, I do not mean the good kind of acid.
I'm sure that somewhere and at some time this could be considered a War Crime, but unfortunately for the Academy, they weren't around to sign the 'Placebo Convention' nullifying any complaints they might have, though then again, none of this craft's crew made it back, so who says the Academy is any the wiser?
If the Academy asks, it was a freak particle-accelerated lightning strike.
*** END LOG ***
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The glass is twice as big as it needs to be"
#######'s Log, Day 30 Month 6, Year ERRO
Things have been relatively calm at the base...sure, there's been a fair share of looting, plundering and other pleasantries which might be less savory to discuss around some people, but there have been no large breakthroughs for a while, that is, until yesterday where we finally broke the code to our crippling poverty...
I asked one of the Brainers about how this would improve our current situation, she followed up by sending me a brief looping holofilm of some red clawed creature proclaiming a love of money, suffice to say, I think I understand her point better now. Notwithstanding all the dosh we make from this fine drink, but I managed to take one or two of these babies off the registry to save for a rainy day, though of course we cannot really tell the weather while sitting underneath a gigantic hill in the middle of nowhere, but I digress.
Furthermore, one of the Brainers finally completed a pet-project of theirs, combining gears and actuators with the functionality of a musket, it is a very strange contraption and I am not sure if it has much of a use at this present moment, but certainly I am sure one of the Gals would love to use this as a more "sporting" duel pistol, though I think having an automatic dueling pistol counts as cheating and bad form, though I guess it doesn't matter if the only one who can complain now has three large incisions in his (or her) chest with an acute case of lead poisoning.
Well, for now I'm going to lie low for a bit, I think some of the other Gals have been wandering around lately, and Lord of Flies' Peasants seem to patrol the corridors late at night, thwacking anyone around with those large sticks of theirs, I guess they have to train in hand-to-hand combat somehow.
*** END LOG ***
"
Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more..."
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